As I sit and ponder, I can come up with all sorts of things I want to get done but as I get the free time to do them my motivation escapes me. This motivation thing is a slippery slope. I take a step and slide back so I just sit there and do nothing. I muster up enough energy and enthusiasm to step again and actually climb a few steps and feel great about it but then I stop and once I stop, I lose my momentum and have to start all over.
What’s sad about this scenario is that I KNOW better. So, I really beat myself up for the struggle that ensues daily. I stare out my eyes and the world seems grey. Sometimes I just think I’m dying but in reality, it’s just old eyes and oh that I am slowly dying. We all die, there is no cure. So, the question becomes, how do you live? I’m 53 and I still have life but I’m telling you – it is much harder to live at 53 than it is at 30. It just is. I have to be 10 times more motivated because the juice and the joints just aren’t there like they used to be.
But where there’s a will there’s a way. I really do believe that it’s just hard to put into practice. It’s so much easier to just go through life numb and live like a walking dead. OMG the dread of living like that is so disheartening and yet it seizes control so much of the time. So, I press on, keep swimming, keep swimming and take the good days with the bad to try and be the person I want to be. To be the person I was created to be but that’s another story. Keep on swimming people.
To See Or Not To See 